Before diving in, I want to say thank you to those that are following along.
I have seen about a 20% decrease in open rates since speaking about this subject.
But quite frankly, I am not concerned…as much as I do this for YOU.
I’m also doing it for ME. These letters are about organizing mental chaos, although I was getting higher open rates with the former letters with“How To’s” & such…
I was getting caught up on the vanity metrics, pulling me away from the main focus of helping you turn inner conflict into peace.
My hypothesis on why the decrease in open rates has occurred is that it’s hard to look at our inner monster in the mirror and acknowledge our insatiable thirst for pleasure.
It’s easier to turn the other way and, as I’ll explain later, “operate on autopilot,” i.e., the Monster in full effect.
But when we understand what’s driving our behaviors, we can take back the reigns and get back on course.
This is why we start at the root…the biology of our desires.
Oh, yea! And I started a YouTube channel with more podcasts and videos
The Monster: Taming the Beast Within
While our goal is to operate in the top-down manner described in last week’s letter, our work to get there starts at the bottom and works its way up.
As we work through each area of the model (Monster, Lion, Man), we must know that we’re cultivating the ability to work top-down throughout the process.
We start with the Monster because this is where most of us have our biggest challenges, and we are oftentimes unaware of what’s happening.
We’re operating on autopilot….
So much of our life is controlled by our appetites for food, sex, comfort, money, drugs, and entertainment that it seems completely normal.
On top of that, we live in a dystopian world that leverages our biology against us.
We have constant access to high-calorie, hyper-palatable food, porn, and dating apps that make sexual arousal easier than ever.
We sit in air-conditioned environments most of the day, riding in our climate-controlled chariots to and from.
There is an overwhelming amount of entertainment at our fingertips, every drug, from caffeine to alcohol, around every corner, and to top it all off, we are continually fed the idea that we need more money to spend on material possessions.
This strips us of our inner ability to take action.
Living this kind of life hijacks our internal motivational systems and steers us toward momentary pleasure that keeps us complacent on the one hand and exhausted on the other.
The Monster within us runs rampant by becoming addicted to highly processed forms of arousal.
So what makes up the Monster?
The Monster is our metaphor for our primal nature that has kept most of us animals alive for millions of years.
It is the oldest part of biology and psychology, deeply rooted in our nervous system.
In many spiritual systems, this is called “the natural man.”
In psychology, it is often referred to as “the unconscious.”
In neuroscience, it’s sometimes called “the reptilian brain.”
Which is responsible for instinctual behaviors necessary for survival.
This part of our nature tends to be both rigid and compulsive.
One of the most important things to understand is that what we call your inner Monster is not a good or bad thing but rather how it relates to your life.
At one extreme, it can be incredibly destructive, as in the case of addiction.
At the other extreme, it drives us to take massive instinctual action.
When we isolate the operating system of the Monster, we see it’s primed for a sense of immediacy.
It works based on moving us from pain to pleasure in the moment, creating a superficial lens of perception biased only toward what's on the surface of our experience.
Let’s explore the Biology of the Monster in detail 👇
Biology of the Monster 🧬
The biology of our primordial nature is comprised of 3 components:
The Activating System
The Master Cycle
The Psychology of the Monster
We’re going to expand on The Activating System today.
In the following weeks, we will cover the remaining two topics and close out the Monster with useful tools and resources.
The Activating System
When it comes to the biology of the Monster, our focus starts with our primary stress response or what we call the “Activating System.”
Stress is a physical sensation experienced in the body that’s colored by our thoughts and emotions.
It’s the pressure we experience in response to a change that requires us to adapt.
This could include negative experiences such as being in extreme physical danger, and it could also have positive experiences like sexual arousal or working towards a goal.
When activated, our stress response causes us to:
Fight (approach)
Flight (retreat)
Freeze (remain in place)
For most of human existence, this response was incredibly adaptive as it caused biochemical changes in the body that prepared us to deal with threats and dangers by providing quick energy and rapid information processing.
This all occurs via the hypothalamic-pituitary-adrenal axis (HPA axis), which releases a cascade of hormones and neurochemicals, such as cortisol and adrenaline, that prime us for action.
Again, to simplify things, we call this the activating system within our framework.
The activating system increases our:
Heart rate
Metabolism
Breathing rate
Blood pressure
Muscle tension
Blood is directed away from our extremities and digestive system towards the brain and larger muscles.
Our pupils dilate to sharpen our vision, and our hearing also becomes more accurate.
Our entire being shifts into a state of hyper-focus. What we focus on determines our outcome.
The problem today is that we do not live in a world where the threat of physical danger is as present as it once was.
Instead, our stress comes from work deadlines, the news, social media, interpersonal conflict, and meeting the overall demands of modern life.
On top of that, we are generally sleep-deprived, malnourished but overfed, and lack adequate physical activity, which all further contribute to the stress that builds in our bodies.
Lastly, we all have traumas that we experience in life that, if not properly worked through, can remain locked inside of us, causing us to be hypervigilant.
Our entire nervous system is dysregulated, which is the nexus between our inner and outer worlds.
This is central to understanding your inner Monster because as your stress load accumulates within your body, “chronic stress,” your body reacts in counterproductive ways.
You start to develop a bias towards seeking pleasure to avoid the internal “pain” you experience in the form of overwhelming stress.
These pleasures are often rooted in things that we are hardwired to seek out for our survival.
From an evolutionary perspective, humans that were quick to seek out high-calorie foods, sexual partners, rest, resources, and altered states of consciousness (ASCs), i.e. drugs, entertainment, meditation, etc., were more likely to survive.
High-calorie food provides longer-lasting energy
Sexual partners provide offspring
Rest provided recovery
Resources provided security
ASCs provided insight and creativity
These were incredibly difficult to achieve 100,000 years ago, but they are abundant and widespread today.
From the shamanic world down to neuroscience, we have been cautioned against letting our inner Monster become untamed because of the damage it can do to ourselves and those around us.
Because of its propensity towards immediate pleasure with no regard for long-term consequences, we can get hyper-focused on the wrong things that move us away from self-transformation.
A Monster focused on:
food creates eating disorders
focused on sex leads to sex or porn addiction
focused on rest or comfort leads to laziness
focused on material resources, we get addicted to money
focused on ASCs, we get lost in the sauce; trading imagined worlds for the one we live.
It progressively narrows our focus until it eclipses everything else.
OK, that’s a lot...and it is enough to chew on for now.
Next week we will dive into The Master Cycle, which is predicated on sleep and how it impacts every waking moment of your life.
Final Thoughts
A friend once said, “I’d like to speak only when it’s sweeter than silence.”
Ever since I heard that, I’ve reflected on it every day.
When I go on my walks throughout the day, it rings the loudest.
It reminds me of what Rumi, the Persian poet, once said…
“Silence is the language of God. All else is poor translation.”
It would mean the world to me if you would send this to someone you feel could use a lift of inspiration. This is my service to the world.
When you're ready, Here are some ways I can help you:
→ The SON Candle - Inspired by faith, to strengthen your prayer & meditation practice. For yourself, or gift it to a loved one. 3% of profits go to the Single Parents Project.
→ Build 1 Thing Community - If you're looking for traction in your personal brand or business, I invite you to join the Build 1 Thing community. It’s free to get in and loaded with resources.
→ Utopian Mind- Understand yourself on every level of existence. Break maladaptively hardwired and conditioned mental models. Construct a mind that allows you to navigate any obstacle in your way.
→ Somatic Breathwork - Using the breath, you will engage your innate ability to heal and sweep out any defenses, blockages, restrictions, or pains that hold you back from who you are and how you want to show up in this world.
Just a reminder, if you haven’t already, please subscribe to my YouTube Channel. More videos & podcasts will be available there 🙌
Ways to Tame Your Desires