Hurt People Hurt People
Healing People Heal People
The beauty of a blog is that you can just be yourself.
The whole purpose of starting this almost a year ago was to organize my mind.
It’s paid dividends…
The ability to express yourself, to organize your thoughts is underestimated.
It translates into so many areas of life, such as the ability to articulate yourself.
Or to follow thought tunnels through and make sense of things.
Think about it…you’re making the conversation in your mind…real.
You can see how it sounds…
I typically write about focus & productivity…but putting yourself in a box is lame.
You’re confined…and who wants that? So I appreciate all of you who continue to follow along, messaging me on IG or texting me for those closer. I love you all.
I’ll write an absolute BANGER this Saturday on Focus & Attention for all my other Philo familia 🧠
Ok, let’s dive into this letter.
The following writing is actually from 162 weeks ago…😦
And the words compared to where I am in life and business, along with what I still write about today, is shockingly consistent.
I mean, I completely forgot about this message I wrote on a bridge while walking downtown Philidelphia.
A friend sent it to me on IG and said the following:
You can’t ever get rid of this post… like ever!!! It allows me to remember that exact moment in time but also to witness my evolution from this moment. This post had/has a ripple effect within me. I mean, look at what has stayed true to your core but how much your reality has shifted since this moment in time as well.
It’s fucking wild the accuracy of her words and the post; she’s not wrong…
It reminds me never to stop writing. To keep spelling it out…
Thoughts > Words > Actions = Manifestation.
Here is what I wrote in the original post.
I'm not sure where this expression initially came from.
I first heard this at a retreat in Costa Rica, bringing a new perspective on speaking and working with people.
Here's my interpretation based on what I've learned.
Many people carry pain.
Each person's interpretation of pain and trauma is unique to themselves.
We cannot look at any one person and assume we share the same trauma.
Let's say one's father may have been an abusive alcoholic towards him or to the mother.
One person can take this trauma and progressively grow; on the other hand, another could regress either consciously or subconsciously.
When we are wounded deeply, we develop dysfunctional behaviors to cope with our traumas, especially as children, ultimately enacting the same or similar characteristics to our significant others.
This is multi-generational trauma.
The pain burrows deep into our souls, body, and heart.
I would suggest and subscribe to the belief that very few people genuinely want to hurt somebody, yet sometimes the reasons why they do is more profound than we can understand.
Compassion is the key to working with people like this.
“Hurt people hurt people.”
This little mantra can help us remember to imagine the “secret history” and “whole truth” behind hurtful actions.
So then, what does “healed people heal people” mean?
My brother Jaggers explains…we are verbs…nobody is healed, but rather we are healing.
So let’s shift this expression to “Healing People Heal People.”
Yea…that feels better.
And before we continue, let's clarify that nobody is better or more valuable than another.
If you feel this way, I suggest you check yourself and discover where that feeling of being better is coming from.
With that out of the way, I will say that on the healing path (because it never ends), you become a healing presence in the world as you increase your awareness.
“One does not become enlightened by imagining figures of light, but by making the darkness conscious.”
~Carl Jung~
One who is actively healing possesses the ability to heal others.
Traumas will always be, no one is exempt, and you cannot predict when they will occur.
However, it provides context on where to focus.
You are among the lightworkers of the world.
Your purpose here is to be here now.
When we focus deeply on the soul, we infuse ourselves with love, peace, joy, and creativity.
Trusting ourselves in allowing the flow of like to take place.
We remove expectations and attachments to certain things holding us back.
We gain control simply by letting go.
By doing so, a more true and honest self comes to fruition.
As this process strengthens, we continue to heal.
Our present alone begins to heal others.
People will begin to question themselves and their own experiences and dive deeper into why they are the way they are and why you are the way you are.
You don’t need to say anything.
You just need to be you.
I fucking love you all.
Big Love, Nadeem.
Final Thoughts
Words from my friend Whitney Urrea.
I pray that your heart and mind always align.
So that you may show up as the best version of yourself.
Ooffph 🤌